I am permanently blind, not from the Cialis-induced vitreous hemorrhage, but because of the PRP laser treatment inflicted by Dr. Michael O’Brien of Koch Eye Associates. I think his employer is as much to blame as Koch has advertised for PRP patients rather than eye tests to see if PRP treatment is prudent for specific patients.
But I still see it as my own fault for letting myself be scared into it. "O’Brien had said, "You’re probably right about the Cialis, but what if you’re not?"
Yes, three years later I remain angry and bitter about this, and other massive "wrongness" from the Koch offices and associates.
I suppress the anger and fight the negativity on a daily basis. Some days don’t succeed as well as others. This is a pattern that has enshrouded me for my entire life. I won’t get into why that’s so. Who wants to hear self pitying whining?
I’ve lost maybe eighty percent of my life to this, and maybe more. Nothing is the same and everything is different, every function, every relationship.
My blindness is legal blindness. The left eye is not dark, just greatly impaired by a few different factors. As long as I have that bit of vision left, as long as I can still find the fridge and the toilet and the keyboard, I can make the most out of what I have left.
I have to content myself with that.
I will content myself with that.
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