The best approach to most patients losing their eyesight is a nonchalant "If you need help with that, just let me know." The patient will know he has help if needed, but feels free to try on his own.
One key to this is to make your offer sincere. If you don’t want to help, keep your mouth shut and don’t make any offers. Just stick to "I’m so sorry to see what happened. Sorry you can’t."
OK, leave off the last part. Not many people share my sense of humor.
One of the worst things is to think you’re being polite and charitable as a means of showing support, then huffing or rolling your eyes if the blind guy ever has the bad manners to take you up on your offer. One neighbor told me to let him know if I ever needed a ride from a recurring local event. I gave sincere thanks and remembered the offer. When I did ask one night, he spent more time asking around for someone willing to drive me the six blocks than it would have taken him to give the ride that had been offered. Any number of excuses may be possible or legitimate, but none could diminish how I felt when I heard him start peddling me off.
Another neighbor, this one more typically ignorant to begin with, pulled over in traffic when he saw me walking the opposite way on a cold and rainy day in April 2010. He talked to me for four minutes or so. When I asked for a ride to my destination three blocks away, he told me he couldn’t because he was heading in the opposite direction.
Newsflash, neighbor: you’re nowhere near interesting enough to talk to that I feel honored that you took time out of your day to partially pull over to say hello and tell me about your life while you obstructed traffic on a city thruway and I got wetter and colder than I would have if I had just waved and continued walking.
I would have even used all five fingers in that wave, which is something I can no longer guarantee you.
No comments:
Post a Comment