Off the Grid and off the Leash

I’m back!
The absence here and in other parts of my life for the past while was to cover the fact that I had surgery for retina reattachment and vitreous gel replacement and possibly more on January 19. I can’t tell you how it went right now because this blog post, along with two others, are being written on 21 December.
I shared details of the impending surgery with very few people. Many of those who knew of the surgery heard lies about when it was. My intention at this point is to tell as few people as possible that I will even be having it. Look back on those mid-December posts and you’ll know I was not in a good frame of mind. Too many life events colluded to make my self control and self sufficiency issues explode. Perhaps my intention to conceal the surgery contained some level of spite towards people who really stressed me out about control issues; sometimes my subconscious does work that way, unfortunately. But on the conscious levels, I didn’t want to hear the input of people who care and/or control. There’s risk to the surgery. It’s all or nothing: it will/did either improve things, provide hope for "permanent" stabilization of how things are now, or make things go totally black.
To share information in advance on the surgery seems like it would foster concern and worry for those who do truly care for me. None of them will be able to control a thing about the surgery, so why foster needless worry?
I do not need to share this burden. Part of my reaction to December’s overload of stresses was that I was facing what could be my final stand. I had been strong and self sufficient my adult life and choose to face this high risk in that mode of operation. I am a tough little bastard who can and dud face this on my own.
The time of my planed absence from the blog and other areas has given me time to reflect on the experiences and time to prepare further posts. I’ll start revealing the experience after a few days, when a few further pre-op posts have been published.
In the meantime, if you are one of those who wants to be planting a boot in my ass for the "sudden disappearance," take a number and get in line.