The Stable System

My "lack of control" regarding my blood sugar developed over years. At the point of "taking care of myself better" circa 2005, I had stable but definite signs of old diabetic damage. Diabetes effects became opportunistic in the face of other problems that developed independently. Throughout those years I had a stable situation that resulted in good health, at the very least as defined by how I felt.
Those years of being a "better" diabetic–never a good diabetic–destabilized me. I have not felt healthy since.
I know this sounds like a load of bull poop. I can’t count how often I am told I am wrong about how I felt and how I feel. I am told that what I report just isn’t possible.
I don’t think it’s that impossible, and I can explain it with knowledge of another hobby I have mostly had to give up to being blind.
If you set up a new tropical fresh water fish tank, you have to create specific conditions that the fish find comfortable. Otherwise, they die. There’s things you shouldn’t put in the tank, there’s things you can’t put in the tank, and things you can’t put in together. There’s some fish such as tiger barbs that thrive in a new tank while your desire for something like neon tetras must wait until the tank’s enclosed system ages. You set the tank up successfully and get it off to a good start.
Time passes. Your diligence fades and you pay less attention to the tank’s ongoing water conditions. The fish in the tank continue to thrive with minimum care of filter cartridge changes and daily feeding. You stop testing the water. Some fish die by attrition. You get more of the same to maintain a school, and they die off quickly. Testing shows that the water is not healthy for the fish. You effect changes to accommodate new fish you want to add, and the changes kill all the old fish that were thriving in the "unhealthy" water. Because the bad changes had happened over time, the old fish adjusted to it.
My body was an enclosed system thriving under bad conditions. The changes I made under my GP’s guidance were textbook and statistical moves towards the way things should" be and they massively disrupted my thriving unhealthy system. The chain of events of unintended consequences directly led to the loss of the good eye and the Charcot foot.
My impossible desire isn’t going back to not taking that dose of Cialis, but going back and never putting myself under care and making those efforts to "take care of myself better." I never needed boner pills when I "wasn’t taking care of myself." Every other function worked better back then too.
My GP says that it all just caught up with me. I find the timing of the decline too perfectly coincidental to believe anything other than that the GP’s statement is just more bull poop.